My Sweetest Downfall
by LittleDarlingXOX
Summary: "Am I supposed to be scared now, Jason?" Tim asked. He gripped Jason's hand holding the knife and placed the point against his chest, over his heart. "If you really don't love me, then finish the job. "
1. Chapter 1

Tim kicked the grimy door with its splintering wood shut as he entered the small safe-house Jason was currently occupying. He yanked his key out of the lock and moved to put the bag of take-out on the kitchen island. The apartment was dark except for the harsh city lights that flooded in through the curtains, illuminating Jason's form hunched over on the couch.

"Hey, I brought Chinese. Extra eggrolls." Tim called into the living room.

"Aren't you supposed to be at the manor tonight? Dinner with the family or something like that." Jason's voice came from the other room, still rough from smoke inhalation from a patrol last week. Tim would have to remember to make him some tea. He moved to find the kettle, spared a long glare at the collection of beer bottles and cigarette butts in the sink, and thought maybe it was time for another talk with Jason about things that were bad for his health.

"Yeah, I skipped. Told them I had a lot of course work to catch up on and promised to meet with them next time."

Jason sat up straighter. "Maybe you should go. I'm not feeling great tonight as it is...I'll probably hit the hay early."

At the mention of illness, Tim abandoned the food he was unpacking and moved to check Jason out. He managed to plant a hand on Jason's face before the older man stepped away. "What are you talking about, Jason? You feel fine."

"Look—I just think it'd been good for you to spend time with the family. I know Dick misses you."

"Dick sees me all the time. I came here to see you." Tim said slowly. Why was Jason talking like this? Usually he was all too eager to have Tim at his apartment, dragging him into the bedroom after a risky night of patrol that brought the two vigilantes together and not letting him go until morning. And family? It wasn't like Jason had gone out of his way to make amends of Bruce or Dick. As far as Tim knew, the only person Jason didn't ignore was Alfred, but the butler's visits were few and seldom.

"Go home, Tim." Jason turned and started to pack up the photos scattered across the coffee table, shuffling them into a stack and acting for all the world like there was nothing more to the matter.

"Hey—" Tim yanked on Jason's arm until the man turned back to face him, though Jason's gaze was directed somewhere near his shoulder. Tim cupped a hand against Jason's face, thumb stroking down his cheek, hoping to direct his gaze back towards his face, but his hand was once again dislodged before he could do anything more.

"This has to stop, Tim." Jason squeezed his eyes closed and rubbed at his forehead, like this conversation was giving him a headache.

"What has to stop? Me bringing you dinner?" He knew he was playing it dumb, but Jason was a complex guy and he didn't want to reading into anything wrong.

"No, not dinner. This—Us—This!" He snapped, glaring around the apartment. "I don't do this domestic, home-making shit. And I don't do relationships."

Tim huffed out a laugh and rubbed the back of his neck. "If you don't do relationships then, tell me, what have we been doing for the past month or so?"

"I thought we were fucking. I didn't think you'd become so attached to me like a damn lost puppy." Jason growled, and if Tim hadn't been trained by the Batman he might have just accepted that, but he was and he knew that Jason was lying.

"I know that's not the reason. You don't just bring a fuck-buddy back to your safe house, you're too paranoid for that. I know you care for me more than you say you do, so I'm staying until you tell me the truth. Then we'll work it out like we always do."

He crossed his arms over his chest and stared expectantly at the ex-robin.

"Tough luck, replacement. That's the reason I'm giving you, so get your ass out of my apartment._ Now."_

Tim continued to glare at him. "I'm not leaving, Jason."

He wasn't expected the shove that sent him stumbling back into the edge of the couch.

"I said get out." When he still didn't move, Jason barged forward and shoved him further back towards the door, seeming to want to expel Tim from his life by sheer force if necessary. Well, Tim wasn't still on this earth because he gave up the moment he was told.

"Fly on home, little bird!" Jason spat. "Go be a good little replacement!"

Tim tried to step out of the way of Jason's next attack, but he was caught and flung forward hard enough for him to trip and fall.

Tim was slow to rise to his feet. "Why are you doing this, Jason? What did I do wrong? You said you loved me..."

Jason barked a laughed and Tim tried not to flinch, because that wasn't the quite rumble he heard late at night while wrapped in Jason's sheets, that was the mad bark of laughter the Red Hood used when he was shooting up a warehouse full of thugs.

"You think I loved you?" Jason sneered. "I think pitied is a better word. What can I say? I felt bad for the lost, little bird who didn't have anyone that cared about him. I thought no harm would come out of it, but I was wrong. You latched on to me and now I'm paying for it."

He doesn't love me, Tim thought, but it didn't make any sense. They'd been fine last week after that close call with Bane. It was nothing some stitches couldn't patch up and Jason had looked a bit shaken for a moment, but he'd been fine...and then it made sense.

"This is because of the other night isn't it. With Bane. You're worried about getting me killed?"

Jason yanked the knife out of his pocket and marched up to Tim, until he was breathing harshly in his face. He fisted his hand into Tim's shirt and pressed the knife hard into the skin at Tim's collarbone. "You the one that should be worried. I'm giving you one last chance to leave or I'm killing you myself."

"Is that your plan? Force me out of your life before you love me too much, so that it doesn't hurt as much when I die on patrol." he asked.

"Am I supposed to be scared now, Jason?" Tim asked. He gripped Jason's hand holding the knife and placed the point against his chest, over his heart. "If you really don't love me as you say you don't, then finish the job. I'd rather be dead than live without you."

Tim stared patiently into his eyes, watching the anger fade only be replaced with an unsuppressed aching need. The knife was dropped to the floor and Tim was crushed against Jason's chest in a hug that liberated him from all the air his lungs.

"To death do us part and all that crap." Jason sighed and rested his cheek against the top of his head.


	2. Chapter 2

**Before...**

Jason trudged his way up the battered stairs of his building. He could clearly hear the television blaring through the too-thin walls of the apartment below him as he made his way up the last damned flight of stairs. Why the hell couldn't he have picked a safe house building with a working elevator? Then he remembered that incident with Black Mask's men last month, and thought, _oh right_...

Once in his apartment, he pulled his guns free of the holsters on his belt, and placed them on the table, next to be remove were his many knives, then his leather jacket was shrugged off and slipped over the chair. Jason stretched his tired muscles and cast a longing glance towards his refrigerator, where the last two bottles of beer were chilling, left over from Roy's surprise visit last week. He opened the fridge door, casting the still dark apartment in a halo of light and grabbed the two remaining bottles before bumping the door shut with his hip as he rooted around in a drawer for the bottle opener.

Jason snapped the cap off of one bottle and took a swig, twirling the bottle opener between his fingers. He pursed his lips. "Are you going to stand in the shadows all night or are you going to say something?"

Jason turned around and leaned his back against the counter, glaring into the shadows until the figure emerged to stand in the light cast in from the windows. "Jason."

Jason took another drink, the bottle resting calmly against his hip. He pointed one finger towards his front door."I thought I told you to use the door when you wanted to see me. Did you not get that message?"

"You kept changing your safe house locations. I couldn't have gotten a hold of you even if I wanted to."

Batman walked forward a little more until he was standing by the table where Jason's weapons were laid out on display. Bruce took a moment to eject the magazines from the two guns and placed them next to the weapons. Jason scowled, did Bruce think he was going to shoot him in his own apartment? As if...he couldn't afford anymore holes in his walls.

"Yeah," Jason drawled, lips posed over the rim of his drink. "I was hoping you would get that message too. Didn't seem to stop you, I see."

"How long did you know I was here?" Batman asked and Jason wanted to laugh. Was Bruce still trying to test his detection skills like he was one of his little birds? Even if one of his runners hadn't stopped him outside his building to tell him Batman had been spotted on the rooftops in the area, Jason still would have sensed that brooding presence the moment he walked through the door. He'd like to think even sooner, but one shouldn't become too cocky. It was unbecoming, as Alfred would say.

"I smelled something sour as I was getting out my keys and at first I thought the milk in my fridge had gone bad. Then I remembered I'm out of milk. I knew it could only be one other thing after that." He flashed his teeth at Batman, hoping to twist that stonewall expression into _anything_ else.

"Amusing." Batman said, though he looked anything but amused under the cowl. "Are you trying to tell me I smell bad?"

Jason rolled his eyes. "I _trying _to tell you that you're so emotionally constipated that it's a wonder you haven't let one loose during patrol and killed frickin Bane!"

"Speaking of which..."

Jason nearly choked on his mouthful of beer. "Excuse me? How is that a speaking of which? Did you come here to talk to me about Bane?"

"No...though Bane can be seen as an example, if you like. I came here to talk to you about Tim."

"What about Tim?" Jason growled, not at all liking the territory Bruce was crossing into. What he had with Tim was private, he'd barely even let Dick in on the fact of their relationship.

"I know about your relationship with him, Jason." Bruce said. Jason's lips twisted at the phrasing, _your relationship with him_, like Jason had somehow blackmailed or tricked Tim into a relationship with him. Wasn't that just novel. It was just like Bruce to assume that no one could love Jason as he was now, instead of the obedient Robin that Bruce wanted him to be. It was just like him to protect Tim's innocent from Jason, like the other boy was incapable of making his own choices.

"I want this relationship to end, Jason. I'll give you the chance to end it yourself, but if you don't, don't assume for a second that I won't take matters into my own hands."

Jason slammed his beer down hard enough that the bottle smashed into pieces, pieces that cut into Jason's palm. His hand was wet with the remaining liquid and a bit of his own blood, but he couldn't careless as this moment. "_Fuck you_," he hissed. "Where the fuck do you get off demanding something like that?"

"Tim was a good Robin and he's a great crime fighter. In almost everything he does, he commits himself, but just in the same way, he _constantly _takes on things that are too much for him. You, Jason¸ are too much for him. He will put his heart and soul into a relationship with you and no doubt he will make you a better person because of it, but I know that if this goes on it's going to get him killed."

"No," Jason said. "You mean I'm going to get him killed. Don't you?"

Bruce's face was as grime and unreadable as always.

"Don't you!" Jason shouted.

"Yes," Bruce said eventually. "One way or another, you're going to get him killed."

Jason shook his head like he was trying to shake Bruce's unpleasant words out of his ears. "You're wrong, wrong on so many levels. I love Tim, more than I've probably love anyone in my whole two damn lives combined and I would never put him into a situation that I knew he couldn't handle. You think you can take one look at our relationship and suddenly you have the right to judge us. You know _nothing_ of what I'd do for him. So take your opinions and get the fuck out of my apartment!"

Batman stepped closer until he was right in front of Jason. "You're reckless, Jason. You've always been reckless. I saw the footage of your fight with Bane, and I watched you put Tim's life on the line to take Bane down. Tim thought he could hide the new stitches when he came to the cave the next day, but I noticed. I refuse to let Tim be another thing that gets broken because of your carelessness."

"Tim is _not _your sidekick anymore." Jason said, his hands balling into fists at his sides. "He has his own identity as Red Robin and he will make his own choices in who he patrols with and who he dates. You have no say in that and I doubt you ever really did."

"I know that." Bruce replied.

Jason's eyes narrowed, realizing what Bruce was getting at. "And neither do I."

If Bruce really expected Jason to become the "Bad Guy" in this, then he had another thing coming. Bruce could rage on about how Jason was immoral for fighting with guns and killing criminals and thugs, but Jason refused to hurt Tim like this. He would not be responsible for breaking his heart.

"Think about it this way Jason. Calculate the number of people you have out for your head." _Too many_, thought Jason. "Then count up the number of people who are after Tim. Now think about the fact that Tim has lost his spleen. Add your reckless behavior into the mix and what do you think you come out with?"

Jason knew, _Death_. If they were lucky it would only be one of them, or maybe, not so lucky, at that...He tried to imagine losing Tim in the field and his heart seemed to tear itself out of his chest. The empty space there ached with phantom pains. He imagined it would feel much the same for Tim in that situation.

"I'd rather you break his heart than break his body. And if you end this now, then there's less of a chance that one of you will be watching the other die on patrol. A broken heart is easier to recover from."

Jason stared hard down at the floor, fighting back the tears that were forming in his eyes. He knew that Bruce was right about this, because Bruce was always thinking in terms of the long run. He did that every night on patrol as Batman.

_He might hate me, but at least he'll be alive_, Jason thought. He nodded once, eyes still pointed down at the floor. Bruce gripped one of Jason's shoulders, Jason could feel the firm fingers of his gauntlet press into his skin.

"You're doing the right thing, Jason. Just like I knew you would. You were always my good soldier."

Jason clenched his eyes shut and said nothing.


End file.
